TAX: INDIA and its true but funny txing structure

Born free Taxed to Death........

Question 1 : What are you doing?
Ans : Business.
Tax : PAY PROFESSIONAL TAX!

Question 2 : What are you doing in Business?
Ans : Selling the Goods.
Tax : PAY SALES TAX!

Question 3 : From where are you getting Goods?
Ans : From other State/Abroad
Tax : PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY & OCTROI

Question 4 : What are you getting in Selling Goods?
Ans : Profit.
Tax : PAY INCOME TAX!

Question 5: How do you distribute profit ?
Ans : By way of dividend
Tax : PAY DIVIDEND DISTRIBUTION TAX

Question 6 : Where you Manufacturing the Goods?
Ans. : Factory...
Tax : PAY EXCISE DUTY!

Question 7 : Do you have Office / Warehouse / Factory?
Ans : Yes
Tax : PAY MUNICIPAL & FIRE TAX!

Question 8 : Do you have Staff?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX!

Question 9 : Doing business in Millions?
Ans. : Yes -- Tax : PAY TURNOVER TAX!
Ans : No -- Tax : Then pay Minimum Alternate Tax

Question 10 : Are you taking out over 25,000 Cash from Bank?
Ans : Yes, for Salary.
Tax : PAY CASH HANDLING TAX!

Question 11 : Where are you taking your client for Lunch & Dinner?
Ans : Hotel
Tax : PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX

Question 12 : Are you going Out of Station for Business?
Ans : Yes
Tax : PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX

Question 13 : Have you taken or given any Services?
Ans : Yes
Tax : PAY SERVICE TAX

Question 14 : How come you got such a Big Amount?
Ans : Gift on birthday.
Tax : PAY GIFT TAX

Question 15.: Do you have any Wealth?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY WEALTH TAX

Question 16 : To reduce Tension, for entertainment, where are you going?
Ans : Cinema or Resort.
Tax : PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX

Question 17 : Have you purchased House?
Ans : Yes
Tax : PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE

Question 18 : How you Travel?
Ans : Bus
Tax : PAY SURCHARGE

Question 19.: Any Additional Tax?
Ans : Yes
Tax : PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADDITIONAL EDUCATIONAL & SURCHARGE ON ALL THE CENTRAL GOVT.'s TAX

Question 20: Delayed any time Paying Any Tax?
Ans : Yes
Tax : PAY INTEREST & PENALTY

21) INDIAN : Can I die now??
Ans : Wait we are about to launch the funeral tax!
(email forward)

Laloo gets a job in Microsoft Corporation......

after loosing out the elections - Shri. Laloo Prasad sent his Bio Data - to apply for a post in Microsoft Corporation, USA.

A few days later he got this reply:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Mr. Laloo Prasad,

You do not meet our requirements. Please do not send any further correspondence.
No phone call shall be entertained.

Thanks
Bill Gates
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Laloo prasad jumped with joy on receiving this reply.

He arranged a press conference : "Bhaiyon aur Behno, aap ko jaan kar khushi hogee ki hum ko Amereeca mein naukri mil gayee hai."

Everyone was delighted. Laloo prasad continued... ... "Ab hum aap sab ko apnaa appointment Letter padkar sunaongaa ? Par letter angreeze main hai - isliyen saath-saath Hindi main translate bhee karoonga.

Dear Mr. Laloo Prasad ---- Pyare Laloo prasad bhaiyya
You do not meet -----aap to miltay hee naheen ho
Our requirement -- humko to zaroorat hai
Please do not send any furthur correspondance ----- AB Letter vetter bhejne ka kaouno zaroorat nahee.
No phone call ----- phoonwa ka bhee zaroorat nahee hai
Shall be entertained ----- bahut khaatir kee jayegi.
Thanks -- aapkaa bahut bahut dhanyavad.
Bill Gates. ---- Tohar Bilva.

enjoy have fun n comment tooooooooooo

Please use your vote:

Salary & Govt. Concessions for a Member of Parliament (MP)
Monthly Salary : 12,000
Expense for Constitution per month :10,000
Office expenditure per month :14,000
Traveling concession (Rs. 8 per km) : 48,000( e.g. For a visit from kerala to Delhi & return: 6000 km)
Daily DA TA during parliament meets : 500/day
Charge for 1 class (A/C) in train: Free (For any number of times)(All over India )
Charge for Business Class in flights : Free for 40 trips / year (With wife or P.A.)
Rent for MP hostel at Delhi : Free
Electricity costs at home : Free up to 50,000 units
Local phone call charge : Free up to 1 ,70,000 calls.
TOTAL expense for a MP [having no qualification] per year : 32,00,000 [i.e.. . 2.66 lakh/month]
TOTAL expense for 5 years : 1,60,00,000
For 534 MPs, the expense for 5 years :8,54,40,00,000 (nearly 855 crores)
AND THE PRIME MINISTER IS ASKING THE HIGHLY QUALIFIED, OUT PERFORMING CEOs TO CUT DOWN THEIR SALARIES...
This is how all our tax money is been swallowed and price hike on our regular commodities. .........
And this is the present condition of our country:
855 crores could make their life livable !!
Think of the great democracy we have........ .........

PLEASE FORWARD THIS MESSAGE TO ALL REAL CITIZENS OF INDIA ....

 

HI FRIENDS VOTING ARE NEAR SO I M REQUESTING YOU FROM MY END FROM ALL OUR INDIA. PLEASE DO VOTE FOR A GOOD AND GREAT LEADER. PLZ DONT WASTE YOUR PRICELESS VOTE ON CORRUPT OR WRONG LEADER.

HUMME SE KISINAKISIKO SHURUAAT KARNI HOGI EK ACHE BHARAT KE LIYE...

(an email forward)

Reccession and cost cutting

Alibaba Aur 40 Chor The,
Ab
Alibaba Aur 30 Chor Ho Gaye.
Batao Kyun ?
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Recession Boss !
10 Chor Ko Nikal Diya.......................
COST CUTTING

handling INDIA me alone!!!

LETS SEE..............
Population of india : 100 crore
9 crore retired
30 crore in state Govt;
17 crore in central Govt.(Both categories don't work)
1 crore IT professional (don't work for India )
25 crore in school
1 crore are under 5 years
15 crore unemployed
1.2 crore u can find anytime in hospitals
Statistics says u find 79,99,998 people anytime in jail
The Balance two are U & Me.
U are busy ' reading blogs.. '..!!
HOW CAN I HANDLE INDIA alone?